Gorgias

Also known as “strong opinions that are weakly held”, the LHTD is about fervently crashing into the discussion – not necessarily (preferably not, in fact) into another opinion – specifically to reveal a wider spectrum of detail. Much like the Large Hadron Collider tries to find the essence of elements by smashing them together rather vehemently, this method does rapid elimination of extraneities. The LHC does not wait for it to happen out of itself, nor does it slowly pick apart the atom core. Discussions are served rather by a clarity of matter.

Not that this is the best system, however. First of all, if people don’t realise you’re being an atom smasher instead of, well, a jerk, they will lose interest. Second (and extended upon point one), black holes are feared by those who do not trust your method. Third, sometimes amazing things come from taking a little longer and slowly picking things apart.

For all other purposes, the LHTD is the Max Power Method of choice for distinguishing conversationalists the world around. (Max Power? “There are three ways of doing things: the right way, the wrong way, and the Max Power way (which is the wrong way, but faster).”)