Gorgias

So like, because I’m heterosexyuwal, I’ll fuck a lady tonight. Not to put too fine a point on it, but I dig the ladies. Butts, tits and legs, right? Right guys? And they’ll dance with me, because I’m funny and attractive, and also quite mysterious when I need to be, e.g. when I order drinks. They’ll (the chicks) be like, “hey, why you got like a mint leaf in my vodka?” and I’ll reply by nodding and winking.

I’ll pay the bartender in normal money but also weird money from a country that isn’t really close to here, as a tip. It’s real mysterious. Also I’ll drink whiskey. And then after the party I’ll go home with a few ladies, or maybe just one if the others are total dogs, am I right? This will be like five in the morning, because the party is totally rad and I’ll be there till really late. And I’ll have hetero sex with a lady by sliding my cock into her dealio a bunch of times and I’ll leave in the morning and leave her a note with something cryptic and my phone number on the back of it.